Frustration

I'm getting really irritated that I've only made a five pound dent in the 50lbs I need to lose since November.  I haven't eaten french fries in three months.  I've been hitting the gym and strength training like never before, eating a lot better than I used to.  I'm making an effort.  Sure, I've slipped up a few times.  There are temptations in college life that are really hard to overcome, chinese here, mexican there...but seriously I'm doing so much better than I used to, honestly so much better, and all I have to show for it is five measly pounds.  It's unreal.  If I hadn't put in all this work would weigh 200lbs by now?  Was the way I was living before that out of whack that such a change only gets me five pounds in loss?  It's scary to think that this is the amount of effort I have to put in just to not gain more. 

I hate this, that in order to not get bigger I have to exercise almost every day, and only eat what I want 1/3 of the time.  I guess I just have to get used to the idea that this is going to require a lot more work and diligence than I originally thought.  I know I could put forth more effort, I guess I though that 60% effort was enough.  I was wrong...this is going to take 100% effort, real dedication.  If I stop if I backslide into my old ways I will gain a ton of weight I know that.  When I don't pay attention I gain...that's just how it is.  My history doesn't lie.  When I came home from Moscow in Dec 2009 I weighed 167lbs.  Over the course of the next semester I gained 13lbs to 180lbs.  In the summer of 2010 I managed to lose 4lbs and I started the fall semester at 176.  Then I made the GOOD decision to quit smoking...I gained 8lbs.  Finally this past November I decided that enough was enough.  Well now I'm down to 179.  And somewhere in there I reached a low of 177.2.  I want to see that number again and still lower.  I can't really give up now can I?